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My wife said yesterday's blog sounded angry. I was far from angry. I was just having a George Carlin moment with the word "think". If you don't know what I mean you can read it here but before you do please read it with a smile on your face and a bit of laughter in your heart.
BULLSH*T-It's Not The Thought That Counts.
And now... What we have all been waiting for. 10 Dirty Christmas Phrases that were meant to be clean.
10. You are right honey. It's a lot bigger than last year.
9. Those are some big balls.
8. Do you think Santa will come?
7. I wonder what's in Santa's sac.
6. I'll lift the skirt and you put it in.
5. I'll get on the ladder and you give it to me gently.
4. I usually suck the end first to make it pointy.
3. I can't tell if they are fake or real.
2. I love dark meat but I only eat white.
And the No.1 Dirty Christmas Phrase that was meant to be clean:
1. To get it to stand up straight, grip it with both hands.
There are 3 things I can't change... my 2 kids, my 1 wife and my 0 rights.